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Cock Rings (or Heavy Metal for Your Junk)

Cock rings.  Not talking about a Prince Albert piercing.  (We can talk about erotic piercing later.)

What is it and why would anyone want to wear some sort of band around their penis or even their scrotum and penis?

A cock ring is a device that encircles the penis or the scrotum and penis to restrict the flow of blood through the region.  You put it on when you are soft so when you erect, blood gets in, but does not get out.  So what’s the point?

It makes you last longer, orgasm harder, your erection is harder, thicker and just a little bit longer.  Often these are prescribed by a urologist as a remedy for erectile dysfunction.  You put the cock ring on, add a vacuum pump and *claps* pump yourself up.  If your ED is not severe or you don’t even have ED (from the amount of commercials I see on the talking parlor box it seems to be an epidemic!) you may just enjoy wearing one.

Dr Tim’s favorite is a thick, heavy stainless steel band that wraps around his entire package.  It increases the sensation similar to someone’s hand wrapped tightly around my excitable bits, and the metal helps me channel my inner barbarian.  You should see the way the veins pop up.  Textured for her pleasure indeed.

But a cock ring does not have be made out of metal.  They can be made out of silicone, leather, nylon, rubber tubing and probably some I have forgotten.  But let’s talk about the safe use of cock rings.

1. Make sure you get a proper fit.  If you are using leather or silicone, there are a variety of snaps and stretchiness to give you a comfortable fit.  Heck, I have even seen some with velcro closures on them.  But metal cock rings are not for beginners.  Grab your junk and a tape measure.  Not the one from your toolbox!  The cloth one from her sewing kit.  (Or yours, I don’t judge.  Wish I had learned a bit more than basic sewing…)  If you are using a larger ring which fits over your cock and balls, wrap the measuring tape around the area behind your testicles and over your penis.  You know, where she grabs you to get your attention.  Make it snug, but not tight.  Take that measurement and divide by 3.14.  This will give you the diameter of the ring you need.

HA!  Made you do geometry!  You just figured out the diameter of a circle by using the circumference.  And all you thought about in geometry class was figuring out you fantasy girl’s cup size.  Heck, I even tried to figure out the water displacement if she lowered those magnificent globes into water.  STAY IN SCHOOL KIDS!

So you take your new metal cock ring, pull your scrotum (or ball bag) through first and then squeeze your penis through.  Told you to do it soft, didn’t I?  Get ready to Unchain Your Beast!  (Or as I like to say when being unzipped, “Release the Kraken!”)

2. OK, we have the right size and we got it on, now what?  Time to get hard.  It will feel rather strange at first.  Like someone has a tight grip on you.  Relax, it’s all good.  Look at how big it is, how thick, how hard, so amazingly masculine.  You are a stallion, baby!  Don’t ever forget it!

However, do not wear it for more than thirty minutes.  It will be easier to remove after orgasm, but long-term wearing could cause some damage.  And damage, especially if you didn’t listen to Dr Tim and bought one that was too tight, can lead to permanent nerve damage, priapism (https://quantumcogitation.com/2011/04/01/priapism-or-how-long-is-too-long/), gangrene which can lead to penile destruction and/or amputation!  Now that would suck.  So pay attention.

3. If your penis becomes cold, turns white or you experience loss of sensation.  Go to the doctor!  And take the ring with you.

Many cock rings have emergency release handles, silicone can be easily stretched or cut off and leather can be unfastened easily.  Several have a textured surface to allow minimal blood return from your erection.  These are not for those of you with ED, see your urologist.  Metal cock rings are not for beginners.

4. Unless prescribed by your physician, cock rings are not for folks taking blood thinners or have diabetes.  Don’t risk your life for a fuck.  Take care of yourself and follow your doctor’s orders!

5. Be careful with your partner.  Sure the cock ring can stimulate her clitoris, but if they can deep throat, watch the teeth.  Your playmate would not really like to explain to the dentist that they chipped their teeth on your metal cock ring.  They may get a discount for having skills, but this is an area that most folks feel uncomfortable discussing.  Oh yes, you may want to trim the pubes.  Trust me.

What else can a cock ring do for you?  Some have vibrators attached for clitoral stimulation or if you reverse it some great under-ball buzzing.  Some have an arm that will reach down and tickle your taint.  You know, it might be easier to go to your local adult emporium and view all of the wonderful cock rings from Doc Johnson.  We have something for everybody!

Guys and Ladies, you really should check out cock rings.  They really bring an extra dimension into your love life.  Why I have even seen women that put a cock ring on their strap-ons!  (Not in real life of course, but on the computer, yeah the computer!)  Functional in the barbarian kind of way, very psychological.

As always, play carefully, take good care of yourself and your partners and maybe next time Dr Tim will tell you what it is like when your Prince Albert gets caught on the shower door handle…

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