Women or, I love you, stay healthy!

I’m baaack!

Today is February 3rd, or Wear Red Day promoting heart health for women.  Serious stuff!  Now you can skip my rambling and go to http://www.fda.gov/ForConsumers/ByAudience/ForWomen/WomensHealthTopics/ucm117974.htm and check it out for yourself.

For your convenience, you can find the information in 18 different languages here: http://www.fda.gov/ForConsumers/ByAudience/ForWomen/FreePublications/ucm126287.htm

There are four basic tenets:

  1. Eat a heart healthy diet.  Basically low salt/sodium, limit trans fats and cut back on sugar.  Stuff we all know how to do, but rarely practice.  (Guilty!)
  2. Manage your health conditions.  If you have high cholesterol, blood pressure, diabetic problems.  Get on the wagon and take care of them.  These can lead to heart problems.  Take your medications and follow your doctor’s advice.
  3. Get the facts about aspirin.  Taking a daily aspirin for preventing heart attacks and strokes is not right for everyone.  So talk to your doctor.  That way you can dial in the appropriate dosage, etc.  And remember to remind them of any other medications you are taking.  I know your doctor should know, but we cannot remember everything all the time.
  4. Know the signs of a heart attack.  Men and women can have different symptoms, so be sure you go over the links I posted above.  Also, check out this video that Elizabeth Banks did a few years ago.  She had a heart attack in real life.  https://youtu.be/t7wmPWTnDbE

Fine.  That’s under your chest.  Now let’s go downstairs.  (I am great at foreplay!)

Pelvic Inflammatory Disease: An estimated 2.5 million women have an often symptomless infection of the urinary tract that can lead to infertility and lasting abdominal pain.  The infection can be cured however, if left untreated long enough, the physical damage may be permanent.  PID is a complication of a previous sexually transmitted disease or STD.  https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/66/wr/mm6603a3.htm

Yes, we are talking about everybody’s friends chlamydia and gonorrhea.  Around 1.5 million cases of chlamydia and 400,000 cases of gonorrhea were reported in 2015.  That’s reported, and we know that not everyone reports their health situations.  Here’s the thing: these diseases often do not show symptoms and can go undiagnosed and untreated.  Now if that leads to PID:

“Pelvic inflammatory disease symptoms may include persistent abdominal pain, fever, abnormal vaginal discharge, or pain or bleeding during sexual intercourse.  PID poses long-term hazards such as infertility, chronic pelvic pain and ectopic pregnancy. Ectopic pregnancies occur when an embryo implants in the fallopian tube instead of the uterus.

No single test can diagnose PID, so doctors often rely on symptom reporting. But PID often doesn’t cause symptoms. “That’s one of the scariest things because you may not know it’s even happening,” she said.”  https://medlineplus.gov/news/fullstory_163399.html

Your background doesn’t matter.  If you are sexually active, get tested every year or as often as your insurance will pay for it.  (Adult actors test every month!)  Because the more active you are with different partners, the bigger your risk.  Make sure that use condoms or other barrier protections.  It is a rough world out there.

So that was a very romantic and sexy return for Quantum Cogitation.  But ladies, take care of yourselves.  You cannot make a difference if you are not around.  Plus, I still think I have a shot with you!  Are you a beaver?  Cuz, Dam!

I will be back more often so please keep sending those cards, letters, photos and videos coming.

 

 

His and Hers (or, Put Them All Together…)

Presented for your approval: Two studies from the Journal of Sexual Medicine.

1. Exercise helps men’s sex life.

2. Sleep helps increase feminine arousal.

Let’s see by show of hands who wasn’t aware of these findings.  Only a few of you?  Good.

Men: Get off your ass and exercise.  Those with 2 or more hours of strenuous exercise, 3.5 hours of moderate exercise or 6 hours of light exercise a week more easily attained erections, stayed hard longer, had better orgasms and more frequent sexual activity.  Hmm, who would have thought that having a toned, fit body increased your sex life?

Women: Apparently each extra hour of sleep you gets may increase the likelihood of sex by 14% the next day.  A well-rested woman is a sexy woman indeed.  She feels it, you feel it and everyone gets happy.  Who knew?  I’ve been putting women to sleep in bed for years and never knew it was increasing my chances.  Guys, if she is sleeping, let her sleep!  You will probably get lucky in the morning.

But what chaps my hide is that I have to bust ass on the stair master while she gets to keep snoozing.  Next thing they’ll tell me is that beef jerky is not an aphrodisiac.  Though I find a spicy dinner puts a warmth in the lower belly that ignites the flame.

Work out, get enough sleep and eat good healthy stuff.  Do I really need to be telling you any of this?  (Oh yeah, buy stuff from Doc Johnson.  Daddy needs some Cajun alligator jerky!)

Sex Stuff 101 (or take a chance)

So there I was, reading the National Institute of Health updates and saw a bit about Healthy Sexuality.  You know me, I clicked the link which took me to a video put out by the American Society of Reproductive Medicine.  Nice website and great videos that cover so many of the basic questions people have about sexuality.

Remember: This site is about the mechanics of sex and while they have passing mentions of sexualities other that heterosexuality, it is about how our bits work for reproduction.  There is a lot about infertility.

But their videos about sexual health, sexual problems and healthy sexuality are certainly worth a look.  Here is a link right to the videos: http://reproductivefacts.org/Full_Length_Patient_Education_Videos/

Copy and paste if your browser won’t let you click it.

Because while we at Doc Johnson love all of the fun and games, we want you to be happy, healthy and loving your life.  (And buy all of your toys/lubes from us!)

IMG_9936

 

Lab-Grown Vaginas

What a great week for science!

There was a follow-up article in The Lancet this month about the success of lab-grown vaginas.  Yes, you read that correctly.

Seems there is a rather rare (or so we hope) birth defect where females are born without complete genital formation.  One interview I read was with a woman who was born without a vaginal canal.  Pretty serious stuff.  Not only does it make life difficult in general, but it could mess with your head too.

Doctors took cells from the patients, created the new tissue and grafted it back onto their bodies.  This was pure science fiction stuff back when I was a baby scientist.  One study dealt with women suffering from Mayer-Rokitansky-Kuster-Hauser syndrome, a genetic condition where the women’s vagina and/or uterus is either underdeveloped or absent.  They harvested muscle and epithelial cells via a biopsy of their genitals.  (Epithelial cells line the body cavities and can release fluid and feel sensations.)  Grew the tissue that was fastened to a biodegradable scaffold which was hand-sewn into a vagina.  Then the surgeons created a canal in the patient’s pelvis and stitched the scaffold into place on their reproductive systems.

The body then forms nerves and blood vessels into the graft and gradually replaced the scaffold with a permanent functioning organ.  This was done between 2005 and 2008.  Annual check-ups show that the lab-grown vaginas and extremely similar to natural tissue in form and function.  Even the doctors could barely tell where the natural tissue ended and the graft began!  The women also tested normal in all areas of sexual function which includes desire, arousal, lubrication, orgasm and sexual satisfaction.

Isn’t that cool?  The doctors are now looking into using the same technique for women with cancer or have been injured in accidents.  Anyone needing vaginal reconstruction.

More amazing efforts on the part of science and medicine.  In an age where science is “evil,” I’m proud to be a scientist.

Now if they could just get 6-7 inch penis enlargement working…

Until that happens, Doc Johnson does have some nice penis extensions.  Like this wonderful toy:

0258_00_CD

Back to Basics (Or, Get down and give me 20!)

Did you ever want to be a marathon sled dog in the sack?  Of course you did.  We all did.  There is hope.

There was a presentation of a small study at the European Congress of Urology in Stockholm recently.  Turns out that there may be something you can do in the privacy of your own home to increase your stamina in bed.  Exercise.  Yep, exercise.

In the study were 40 men, aged 19-46, with lifelong premature ejaculation.  They followed a 12 week program of exercising their floor pelvic muscles.  And guess what happened.

After the three months, the period of time to reach ejaculation increased from 32 seconds to 2.5 minutes!  That is astounding.  That gave them 4.6 times longer to enjoy lovemaking with their significant other.

Think about that for a second.  These men went from your basic “in-out-done” to a much more intimate sexual relationship.  One where there was time to gaze into eyes, call out names several times or re-weave their hair from behind.  Can you imagine the psychological impact of this?

Think of the increase in self-confidence.  That man can now enjoy his life better, improve his relationship, get a raise and be who he always thought he could be.  And that is a d*mn sexy trait in men.

You see, if someone could ease one of their biggest disappointments in life, the world opens up to him.  Now pelvic floor exercises have been used to improve incontinence in men for years.  Especially after prostate surgery.  But they had never really tried them for premature ejaculation, well, not for anyone that suffered from it for a long time.  Great stuff.

I certainly hope when they publish and can run larger studies that this will hold true.

Now Doc Johnson, amazing company that it is, cannot help you exercise.  You gotta do that on your own buddy.  However, when you are not in the gym, we can help delay your premature ejaculation as well.

 

1310_01_BU 1310_02_BU

These are what the FDA calls “Male Genital Desensitizers.”  Using benzocaine, it will decrease the amount of stimulation you feel through your penis.  That should really help you out in the interim.

Just apply to the underside of the head of your penis, wait a second or two, then proceed with your business.  I don’t care who you are sticking it to, but hopefully this will make the encounter more fun for both of you.

Here are a couple links about how you can start doing these exercises today:

http://www.webmd.com/men/pelvic-floor-kegel-exercises-for-men

http://www.askthetrainer.com/pelvic-floor-exercises-for-men/

Remember kids, stay in school and the gym!  And keep those cards, letters, naughty pictures and videos coming in!

 

Automatic Orgasm (Or, Ring My Chimes!)

How I love when science moves towards filling our expectations.  I mean, sure it is 2014 and I don’t have a flying car yet, but this is almost as good.

Seems that scientists in the US have patented an implant that would give women an orgasm at the touch of a button.  I know, right?  There is a lot of orgasmic dysfunction out there in the world and many women have problems reaching climax.  Any number of issues can cause this problem.  One of them, apparently, is that with similar physical responses women can confuse arousal with fear which makes them want to avoid the situation.  Therapy is available, but guess what, Valium can delay orgasm.  Who knew?  We could talk about the causes of orgasmic dysfunction until the cows come home and still not have scratched the surface.

So let’s move on to the discovery.  A North Carolina surgeon, Stuart Meloy, got the idea when he was performing a spinal pain-relief operation on a woman.  The patient stays alert during the operation so that the surgeon can plant the electrodes in the best position.  Apparently he found her sweet spot as she orgasmed on the operating table.  Clinical trails should begin later this year.

Dr. Meloy began working with Medtronic and developed the device.  Right now, it is just smaller than a pack of cigarettes and would be implanted in the buttocks.  Then you get a nifty remote to trigger it.  This is just as invasive as getting a pacemaker, so they would like to limit it to extreme cases.

Like that’s going to happen.  He also wants to program it to limit how much it can be used.  Not gonna happen either.  If it is successful, they will become as popular as breast implants.  Everyone is going to want one.  I imagine as time goes on, the device will get smaller and smaller and be much easier to obtain.  Who wouldn’t want Orgasms on Tap?  And can you imagine unending multiple orgasms?  Some women will never get out of bed again!

They haven’t tested it on men yet, but expect similar results.

What do you think?  Aid or the end of humanity?  Everyone should have orgasms, but they are more fun together.  Let’s keep hooking up people!  And while you are doing that, I will be trying to figure out how to get Doc Johnson’s name on that thing.  Or at least the universal remote…

Now’s where my flying car?

Summer Surprise (or, Fashion magazines kick a**)

Is it really Labor Day already?

Seems like it was July just a second ago, and here I am home from Burning Man.  *We’ll talk about that another day.)

Fashion magazines.  Full of fashion, fluff and nonsense.  Or are they?

Sometimes there are very pleasant surprises such as an excellent article on a very serious subject for the Ladies, pelvic pain.

Please check out these links.  Hopefully they will help someone we know and love.  Could even be you!

 

http://www.elle.com/beauty/health-fitness/cure-pelvic-pain

http://www.elle.com/beauty/health-fitness/pelvic-therapy-practitioner-amy-stein-interview

http://beyondbasicspt.wordpress.com/

 

And of course, the Mighty Doc Johnson has some items to help you:

0292_15_BU0292_07_BU  0292_07_BX 0292_15_BX_FR

And don’t forget the lube!

 

 

Fight Cancer (or, Boobies!)

OK folks, this may just be a wonderful fantasy, but here it is:

Squeezing boobs may prevent breast cancer.

http://www.mnn.com/health/fitness-well-being/stories/squeeze-breasts-to-fight-cancer-study-says

The real report:

http://newscenter.berkeley.edu/2012/12/17/malignant-breast-cells-grow-normally-when-compressed/

Therefore, I hereby volunteer Dr Tim’s services for all ladies interested in preventative medicine.

All sizes welcome…

Entering the Home Stretch (or, Dream BIG!)

What a big asshole!

With whom am I angry?  No one.  No one at all.  Today we talk about stretching.  Not stretch marks, not playing 21 when you are 70.  Orifice stretching.

Over 11 inches around!

Over 11 inches around!

That’s right folks, we are stretching open your asshole!  Some people develop a real fetish about how far they can enlarge their anal opening.  Why?  Who knows?  One suggestion is that taking something bigger each time is like losing your virginity all over again.  Start small, and sooner or later, we have a new car port.

So how to start?  Well, remember that time your finger broke through the toilet paper and your eyes flew open when you sank in knuckle-deep?  That’s one way.  Or you could start with a small dildo.  Or…

Work it up or work your way down!

Work it up or work your way down!

Doc Johnson has all types of toys and devices to satisfy all of your anal needs.  Now you may be saying, “Dr Tim, those look so cold and impersonal.  How can I get a human touch without actually involving another human?”  We can help.

Feels so good!

Feels so good!

See?  We are here to help you open up and let the sun shine in!  Even if it is the place “where the sun doesn’t shine,” usually.

That doesn’t actually address why people stuff such large toys into their openings.  Some like the feeling of fullness, being airtight.  Others take the humiliation route (keep it consensual!) and like to be “forced” into surrendering themselves to massive insertions.  I know a couple of people who just like the challenge and want to be known as the one who sat on a Honda and it disappeared!

Now Dr Tim loves a nice, easy access orifice, but I would like to them to be able to feel me as well.  So let’s take just a moment or two and talk about taking care of your ass.

Actually, let me refer you to a very wise and learned blog post: https://quantumcogitation.com/2010/04/30/interesting-question-caution-naughtiness-ahead/

There I cover the anatomy of the anus, different scenarios and good things about butt-fucking.  Just remember a few things: Keep your ass clean, do your kegels and use lots and lots of lube!  (Did I mention that Doc Johnson sells lubricants?  Thought so.  Daddy needs to get paid!)

Water-based but feels like silicone!

Water-based but feels like silicone!

So spank it, lick it, fuck it, kiss it, spread it and take pictures!  Just remember to love your asshole and use genuine Doc Johnson lubes and toys.  (And be on the look out for our Oralove flushable feminine hygiene wipes!)

Quote of the Day (Or, Lovely Sentiment)

So there I was, having a conversation with an amazing woman at work.  She was commenting on the fact that not everyone privileged to work at a company which empowers people to embrace their sexuality, is as open-minded as those of us who do.  Well, to be quite honest, everyone regardless of employment may have certain phobias of a sexual nature.

Can you guess our topic?  That’s right!  Butt sex!

She had overheard some folks disparaging butt plugs.  You are familiar with butt plugs aren’t you?  They come in all shapes and sizes for your specific anal pleasure.  For example:

The folks she overheard were none too complimentary towards the intended use of said item or the people who use them.

That is when she uttered my Quote of the Day: “If their ass is a sacred temple of flatulence and waste, I feel sorry for them!”

What a powerful statement!

All types of men, women and trans use butt plugs to fulfill their needs and desires.  Nothing wrong with that!  Some like the feeling of fullness, the stretching or just get off on the deed.

Remember: It is your ass.  Enjoy it!

Previous Older Entries