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Women or, I love you, stay healthy!

I’m baaack!

Today is February 3rd, or Wear Red Day promoting heart health for women.  Serious stuff!  Now you can skip my rambling and go to http://www.fda.gov/ForConsumers/ByAudience/ForWomen/WomensHealthTopics/ucm117974.htm and check it out for yourself.

For your convenience, you can find the information in 18 different languages here: http://www.fda.gov/ForConsumers/ByAudience/ForWomen/FreePublications/ucm126287.htm

There are four basic tenets:

  1. Eat a heart healthy diet.  Basically low salt/sodium, limit trans fats and cut back on sugar.  Stuff we all know how to do, but rarely practice.  (Guilty!)
  2. Manage your health conditions.  If you have high cholesterol, blood pressure, diabetic problems.  Get on the wagon and take care of them.  These can lead to heart problems.  Take your medications and follow your doctor’s advice.
  3. Get the facts about aspirin.  Taking a daily aspirin for preventing heart attacks and strokes is not right for everyone.  So talk to your doctor.  That way you can dial in the appropriate dosage, etc.  And remember to remind them of any other medications you are taking.  I know your doctor should know, but we cannot remember everything all the time.
  4. Know the signs of a heart attack.  Men and women can have different symptoms, so be sure you go over the links I posted above.  Also, check out this video that Elizabeth Banks did a few years ago.  She had a heart attack in real life.  https://youtu.be/t7wmPWTnDbE

Fine.  That’s under your chest.  Now let’s go downstairs.  (I am great at foreplay!)

Pelvic Inflammatory Disease: An estimated 2.5 million women have an often symptomless infection of the urinary tract that can lead to infertility and lasting abdominal pain.  The infection can be cured however, if left untreated long enough, the physical damage may be permanent.  PID is a complication of a previous sexually transmitted disease or STD.  https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/66/wr/mm6603a3.htm

Yes, we are talking about everybody’s friends chlamydia and gonorrhea.  Around 1.5 million cases of chlamydia and 400,000 cases of gonorrhea were reported in 2015.  That’s reported, and we know that not everyone reports their health situations.  Here’s the thing: these diseases often do not show symptoms and can go undiagnosed and untreated.  Now if that leads to PID:

“Pelvic inflammatory disease symptoms may include persistent abdominal pain, fever, abnormal vaginal discharge, or pain or bleeding during sexual intercourse.  PID poses long-term hazards such as infertility, chronic pelvic pain and ectopic pregnancy. Ectopic pregnancies occur when an embryo implants in the fallopian tube instead of the uterus.

No single test can diagnose PID, so doctors often rely on symptom reporting. But PID often doesn’t cause symptoms. “That’s one of the scariest things because you may not know it’s even happening,” she said.”  https://medlineplus.gov/news/fullstory_163399.html

Your background doesn’t matter.  If you are sexually active, get tested every year or as often as your insurance will pay for it.  (Adult actors test every month!)  Because the more active you are with different partners, the bigger your risk.  Make sure that use condoms or other barrier protections.  It is a rough world out there.

So that was a very romantic and sexy return for Quantum Cogitation.  But ladies, take care of yourselves.  You cannot make a difference if you are not around.  Plus, I still think I have a shot with you!  Are you a beaver?  Cuz, Dam!

I will be back more often so please keep sending those cards, letters, photos and videos coming.

 

 

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Sexting (or, check your phone!)

Sexting is awesome!  Fun, titillating and gives me a reason to not hate having a smartphone.

However, it is also fraught with danger, especially for children.  But for adults, a recent study shows so much benefit from nasty texts.

http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/news/fullstory_154019.html

88% of the folks in the survey admitted to texting.  Almost nine out of ten.  That is a whole lot of data usage.  And it turns out that women tend to send sexts instead of receiving them.  Food for thought?  And that almost 75% of the respondents exchanged sexts with a committed partner.  Warms the heart.  As mentioned in the article, perhaps that is one way couples can talk about sex if a face-to-face discussion would be too intense for them.  I am certainly in favor for anything that improves communication between partners.  With luck, sexting fantasies can make their way into the bedroom, boardroom or even the garage!

As stated in the article, “But greater sexting frequency was linked to greater sexual satisfaction among both men and women, particularly when sexters were in a relationship, the survey found. In fact, with the exception of those who said they were in a “very committed” relationship, couples who sexted more often were more likely to say they were satisfied with their relationship. For those in very committed relationships, sexting made no difference in sexual satisfaction, the study found.

By contrast, sexting had little effect on sexual satisfaction for people who weren’t in relationships. Twenty-six percent of the group described themselves as single, the survey found.”

So for better or for worse, sexting is here to stay.

So how do you feel about sexting?  Dr Tim certainly enjoys it.  And knowing that those sexts are out there in the cyber universe doesn’t bother me in the least.  Oh my goodness, the government might discover that I enjoy sex!  Heavens, I feel that I may swoon.  And for those of us that work too much and play too little, it seems as that is as close to “afternoon delight” as most of us get these days.  In fact, perhaps the mighty Doc Johnson could help make your sexts a little sweeter to your sweetie.

Imagine sending a little something using some of these items:

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That will light up their eyes and fire that devious imagination.  But then that is probably why you sent them a sext in the first place!  Have fun, win awards and as always, keep sending in those naughty sexts and videos.  Dr Tim loves each and every one of you!

 

Ask the Doc (or, Shameless Plug!)

Greetings oh mighty tantric warriors!

Today I want to clue you in on a little secret.  Doc Johnson has a radio show!

Sadly it does not star yours truly, but is instead helmed by Chad and Sunny.

You never know what will happen!

You never know what will happen!

These two fun folks are the Creative Director and Head of Marketing, respectively.  And they are a blast.  Sweet, sexy, nasty and knowledgable.  (You decide whom is which.) They talk about sex stuff, interview experts, adult stars and make some cute videos.  Oh, they also take phone comments.  (You can hear Dr Tim on at least one show.  Hint: pubic hair…)

So, let the links begin:

http://playboyradio.com/shows/ask-the-doc/

http://www.docjohnson.com/askthedocshow

https://www.facebook.com/askthedocshow/app_190322544333196

https://soundcloud.com/ask-the-doc

http://www.podcastchart.com/podcasts/ask-the-doc

https://www.youtube.com/user/DOCJOHNSON1976/featured

https://twitter.com/askthedocshow

 

Check them out.  They are hotter than a ten-dollar laser.

 

 

 

SEX! (Or, What are you looking for?)

Have you seen this article?

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/25/opinion/sunday/seth-stephens-davidowitz-searching-for-sex.html

Check it out and leave me some comments.  We will discuss…

 

Black Roses (or, We Haz Them)

How was your Valentines Day?  Did you get any?

C’mon, even married people get laid on Valentines Day.  It is practically the law.  (Federal law, it is much more than a state thing.)

You didn’t? well, even women get blue balls…

Blue Balls.  We Has ‘Em.  However, they are the amazing Blooming Ben Wa Balls in the brilliant Black Rose line by Doc Johnson!

If they turn this color, OUCH!

If they turn this color, OUCH!

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Now that sounds like much more fun, doesn’t it?

Yes, Valentines Day is much like Bondage & Discipline.  You always hurt the one you love.  And boy, at Doc Johnson do we have some classy ways to do it too.  We’ve got everything!  Harnesses, cuffs, strap-ons, paddles, whips and other weapons of ass destruction.  Spice up your love life.  These can be used in any room of the house.  This is a very nice selection of products.  Wanna see some more pictures?  Me too!

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So you are probably thinking, “Strap-ons are über-cool!  But is that the only thrill available for anal pleasure?”

Fear not my bung-loving lovers.  We have some amazing purple butt plugs for you in the very same Black Rose line.  (Yes, purple product in Black Rose.  Bruises often turn purple before they go black.  Won’t tell you exactly how I know, but I’m sure you can find the videos on-line.  Can’t you, you little web-monkeys?)

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And what’s that?  An AMAZING lubricant from Good Old Dr Tim’s research lab!  What a wonderful world!  Remember:  Doc Johnson lubes help you get in and get back out easily, smoothly and with oh so much pleasure!

It is not too late!  Since here and now we are alive, go get some of those great Doc Johnson toys and lubes!  Show yourself or your significant other(s) how much you care.  Tie them up or let yourself be tied up to let your imagination soar.  Imagine how you will please your bound beauty.  Or how they will please you.  Life is good.  Seize the Day!

As for Dr Tim?  Just keep those cards, letters, pictures and videos coming in!  You inspire me.  Yes you do.  After all, how do you think I test all these lubes and potions?  My only thoughts are about you.

And while I am not sure this is what Linda Ronstadt was thinking about when she recorded her album Living in the USA back in 1978, just send me Black Roses…

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More is Less (or, So, What are You Wearing?)

OK.  I admit it. 

I love women’s clothes.  There, it is out in the open now.  Think what you want, but now we can move into our conversation for today.

So, what are you wearing?  Oh yeah, Baby!  You know what Daddy likes!

Clothing and sexuality have a close-knit relationship.  (See what I did there?)  The way you dress expresses the way you see yourself to others.  That outfit tells us how you are feeling and what you need.  Men and women get a real clue.  If you have the strength to walk into a party wearing a full-length tiger-print silk sheath and high heels, you will run the show.

Let’s talk t-shirts.  I love t-shirts.  I especially love them when a woman is wearing one.  Wearing a t-shirt lets us know that she is feeling secure.  A secure woman is a sexy woman.  There is this Blonde with Major Boobage with whom I have frequent meetings that knocks me out when she wears a t-shirt.  I wish she didn’t wear a bra with it as well, but you can’t always get what you want.  In fact, when I mentioned to her that the bra was unnecessary, she told me it was.

“I know you, Dr Tim.  If I didn’t wear a bra you would just happen by with a bucket of cold water that just might accidentally spill in my direction.”

She was right.  I wanted to test that theory, but she would have none of it and I would get none of it either.  *SIGH*

You know what else I have a clothes fetish for?  Fuzzy sweaters.  Oh man, big soft boobs encased in a layer of warm, fuzzy, snuggly wonderfulness.  It makes a grown man leak.  Puddles, not just caused by women!  Now I know what you might be thinking. 

“Dr Tim! When are you going to discuss sexy lingerie?”

Just a moment.  Keep your pants on.  Well at least keep them on up to your knees…

There is something else I wanted to discuss about t-shirts.  They can hide many fascinating experiences.  Have you ever lifted up a woman’s t-shirt and found a strap-on underneath?  Never saw it coming did you?  Neither did I, but baby, what a ride!  (By the way, Doc Johnson sells all types of strap-ons, harnesses, dildos, lubricants, just everything you would need!  Buy some today!)

Another great thing about t-shirts is their flexibility!  Say you were on a picnic in the woods and your lady is feeling the need for anal sex.  You can twist and pull on that t-shirt while trying to stay on for 8 seconds and it will look JUST FINE when the two of you are finished!  We need more clothes like this!  Or after a sloppy blowjob or muff dive at home, that t-shirt can be thrown into the laundry without any fuss or muss.  T-shirts – The world’s perfect clothing item?

OK, sexy lingerie.  I knew a fine young lady in college with Colossal Boobage who would opine, “Dr Tim. (Actually I was just Mr Tim back then.)  I love the feel and how I look in my sexy lingerie, but I never get to wear it long when men are around.”  I wanted to test that theory.  She had a lot of it and I got a lot of it too!  I still smile when I think of her.  (When she invited me to her wedding, her soon-to-be husband uninvited me and reminded me that the ushers and groomsmen were his brothers and cousins.)

I always did have a way with women that other men hated.

Does all of this make Dr Tim anti-nudity?  Of course not.  I’m just saying that the clothes make the woman or man.  And hopefully we will get to make you too!

Just don’t get me started about shoes!

A Parent Moment (or What do you do at work all day Daddy?)

I had one of those rare parenting moments the other day.  If you have raised any children or are raising some now, you the type I mean.  A question that blindsides you, leaving you momentarily stunned.

My baby boy (Yes, he is 20 years old now, but he will always be my baby boy.) hit me with this gem,

“Dad, do you know anything about bondage?”

“I might know a thing or two about it.”

Hmm…  OK, in for a penny, in for a pound. 

“Why?”

“I’d really like to tie someone up and think I would be pretty good at it.”

Not what you would expect from someone who you swear you just taught how to ride a bicycle and throw a ball yesterday.  Well, rather than direct him to my blog (https://quantumcogitation.com/2012/06/08/bondage-time-or-excuse-me-but-im-a-bit-tied-up/), I decided to have a rather frank conversation with him about sex, STD’s, HIV, you know, all the bad stuff.

“Dad, I know all of that stuff.  And you know I don’t have a girlfriend right now.”

Fine.  Let’s talk fetish.  Which if you are a regular reader of my blog, you’d know I have a passing knowledge of the subject.  (All my love to Taylor St Claire and Debi Diamond!)

“Well you’re not going to tie me up!”

“DAD!”

“Glad that’s out-of-the-way. How much research have you done?  Seen anything on the internet you like?”

He wasn’t sure, so I introduced him to the subject of shibari, Japanese bondage.  We did a search together and I directed him to trusted links.  (That means I know the webmaster and am secure in the low virus risk.)

This is what he was needed.  My son is an accomplished artist currently specializing in manga.  Of course Doc Johnson has the new Black Rose line and some magnificent colored ropes for just such a purpose.  http://www.docjohnson.com/bondagerope-japanese-style-purple.html

As an artist, he loves purple and all of the designs he could create using rope patterns and the various colors/textures.

“Can you get me some of these?  Purple ropes and the purple silk?”

“Sure, but if you do not have a girlfriend, how are you going to use them?”

“I”ll just practice on myself.”

Shades of David Carradine!

So we a talk about safety, not tying yourself up to the point of no escape.  Frankly I do not need to come home and find my naked son tied up on the couch.  I might find it amusing later and fodder for endless jibes, but nothing I ever really need to see in my lifetime.

So if you doing self-bondage, always be sure you leave yourself a way to escape.  Just in case your Mother or UPS comes to the door.  I did have a friend who was quite fond of handcuffs.  He would freeze the key in a block of ice, then leave it in a pan where he could reach it when it thawed.  He used a pan because once the ice as it melted slid off the table and he had to be released by a friend.

Keep a cell phone within reach in case something like that happens.  Better embarrassed than tied up for a week with no food or bathroom!

So in the end, be frank, be honest, be careful and always buy bondage supplies from Doc Johnson.  (Remember?  They pay me!)

And while a bit discomforting, it is great to know that your kids can come to you with any issues they need to discuss.

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