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Hi Everybody! (Hi Dr Tim!)

OK, so I am a bit late.  Spent way too much time and money at the Annual Newberry Library Book Fair.  (http://www.newberry.org/book-fair-blog)

So let’s catch up.  Dr Tim is now a free agent in the Sex Toy and Adult Entertainment world.  That means you will see things from many different companies featured on my blog.  (For transparency sake, no one is paying me or gifting me with anything yet to do my blog.  It is a labor of love…)

So, ANME Summer 2016.  I was able to attend the Adult Novelty Manufacturers’ Expo (http://www.anmefounders.com/) and had a wonderful time.  I saw lots of new toys, saw old friends and made some new ones as well.  Top that off with a free lunch and the show was nothing short of miraculous!

Here are some photo highlights:

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You  may recognize some of the people, but we have Gianna Michaels, Siouxsie Q, Marcelo, a wonderful lady, BUCK ANGEL(!), a picture of Kendra Lust and my dear friend Sunny!  Sorry, no pictures of GameLink’s Jeff Dillionaire and other notables.  It was quite the party.  Here are a few of the cool toys and stuff:

20160717_141430 20160717_122356 20160717_121532 20160717_121526_001 20160717_112542 20160717_112301 20160717_105348_001

WOW!  Doc Johnson and Kink went in together to do some very cool stuff.  You will see some of Dr Tim’s products (the Erase Spray will remove magic marker body writing quite easily), a model that shows the optimum areas for butt-paddling so as not to cause serious injury, massage candles, Motorhead and Motley crew vibrators in case you want to bang more than your heads, and app controlled sex toys that also play tunes and have unlock-able achievement levels.

So all in all, a rousing show.  Hopefully I will get a Kink fucking machine to test…

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2013 (or, Here we go again!)

Ho, ho, ho!  Happy New Year!

Now I certainly do not want to rain on your Rose Parade, but…

All that happened was this little ball of dirt we call home completed another circuit around the sun.  Hooray.

We are celebrating Cosmic Nascar.   And Mercury just lapped us again.

Oh Bother!  (Yes, bother. Didn’t you read the classics when you were a kid?)

However, I am a not fussy man.  Not like Old Uncle Bloggsy, who has his own blog; http://www.newberry.org/book-fair-blog.  He puts the “mudge” in curmudgeon.

2012 was full of memorable events.  Some of which filled me with joy, others that left me sobbing by the side of the road.  Nevertheless, it was ride not to be missed.  Now that I think of it, perhaps New Year doesn’t come from a bottle.  And the true meaning of New Year is something much more.  It is a reference point.  And any scientist will tell you, reference points are most important.  This is a time when we traditionally look at ourselves and assess the good and the bad.

So how did you do?

Dr Tim’s year was a bit extreme.  I sunk as low as a man could go.  Went into isolation.  Hell looked like Heaven after what I was going through.  And it burned.  I had my soul hammered on the anvils of Hell.  My thoughts, principles, ethics and life were in balance.  And I almost let go.  Would have been easy too.  No more pain, no more suffering, no more darn alarm clocks.  Death has always fascinated me.  When my first wedding became known folks commented that it was like “Edgar Allen Poe marrying Sylvia Plath.”  There no longer seemed to be a point.

But then that old spark lit up my brain like the Fourth of July.  Seems as though I am made of some pretty stern stuff.  I remembered who I was; I was me the whole time.  Imagine my surprise.  Found my reference point, re-anchored and came out the other side.  Singed, but shining.  Told you that reference points were important.

And how I laughed as Kathy Griffin kept trying to give Anderson Cooper a blowjob on CNN.  She slips down to her knees very easily, if you catch my drift.  Suddenly I am much more attracted to her!

2013, how ya doing?  Not sure what you have in store for me, but in the words of a famous politician, “Bring It On!”

Oh yes, be sure to love and always use your Official Doc Johnson Toys and Lubes!  After all, if I am sticking around, Daddy needs to get paid!  (ANME Show next week!  Wait until you see what Doc Johnson is bringing soon to a bedroom near you!)

‘Tis The Season! (or, Gimmie, Gimmie!)

Ah, the holidays!

What a wonderful time to look back, review your year and make the appropriate adjustments so that the coming year is even better.  You become a better person, the type of person you had always hoped that you would be when you grew up.  Kind, generous, respected and well-loved.

Time to get nostalgic about family, friends, lost or found loves.  Tradition.

Speaking of tradition, WHAT DID YOU GET ME?????

Most of you were nice.  Some of you were very naughty.  And a few of you were nicely naughty and sent Dr Tim pictures and videos of yourselves using your fine Doc Johnson toys and lubricants!  Warms my heart.  Truly!  No cash, but a warm fuzzy feeling like when she hasn’t shaved for a week or so.

So how was your year?  Did you finally find a woman who was “all-access?”  Did you find a man who wasn’t threatened by your toys or that strap-on dildo you bought?

My year was great.  Here at Doc Johnson we had some very successful shows including a spectacular one at Hustler Hollywood!  It was all about the Wonderland.

It was AMAZING!

It was AMAZING!

Other awesome stuff happened too.  Great folks getting their body parts molded, like James Deen and Vicky Vette.  It was an incredibly exciting year!

And wait until you see 2013!  We have new toys and new lubricants coming out that will blow your mind.  And help you get blown as well.

I mean, after all, what are the holidays without a heaping dose of holiday sex?

Someone asked the other day if I had a favorite sex toy.  Of course I do!  It’s Debi Diamond!  (A kind gentle soul who is sexy and kinky to the core.  Now if I could get her and Christy Canyon at the same time…)

What better gift to give a loved one, or stranger, than a long slow blowjob or maybe some anal sex?  Men and women around the globe would love to receive those presents.  Many at the same time.  Ever been to an out-of-control office party?  Like that only everyone keeps their jobs.

And Doc Johnson is there to supply all of your sexual accessories.  Your orientation doesn’t matter, we have what you need.  All types of dildos, vibrators, masturbators, lubes and lotions.  We help make the season bright.  Or turn off the lights, we are just happy to be there with you.

So don’t be selfish this season.  Give orgasms to everyone you meet.  And maybe you will receive a few of your own.  No matter the fetish or form, we are here for you.

And like Dr Tim always says, unless he doesn’t, “I don’t judge.  I just want to hold the camcorder.”

Merry Christmas everyone!  And until next year, enjoy your ho, ho, hos!

 

Inappropriate! (Or, Did I Just Mention Sex Out Loud?)

So how is your summer going?

Did you take some time off, go to the Newberry Library Book Fair (July 26-29  just saying), or just sit around naked next to the air conditioner at home?

Well I have been quite busy.  Yes it is time for the Annual Summer ANME show!  http://www.anmefounders.com/  During the wicked heat of July, the Adult Novelty Manufacturer Expo will be taking place in beautiful downtown Burbank this weekend.  (Actually it is by the airport, but how often do I get the chance to say “Beautiful Downtown Burbank?”)

And boy oh boy are we going to be showing some wild stuff.  Of course I cannot tell you what it is because the show starts tonight.  And just like Christmas Eve, I must wait until it is approved for me to tell you about all of the wonders.  Maybe I will even get to post pictures!  (Like these: https://quantumcogitation.com/2012/01/16/trade-show-fever-or-part-one/)

Ron & Chad Braverman (Read about them in Los Angeles Magazine!)

But what an exciting weekend this will be!  I will be strolling around looking at all of the new and exciting products that will be unveiled.  Products designed to lift your sexual appetites and show you ways of pleasure that perhaps you have never imagined.  There will be something for everyone no matter your preference.

Fifty Shades of “Oh My!”

Life is pretty good.  But while we do our best to help you fulfill your fantasies, we often run into some risky situations.

You see, our job is to think about sex EVERY DAY.  We have to think about it, analyse it and look for ways to make it more enjoyable.  There are lots of different people out there in the world with a lot of different needs.  How can we help them?  And as such, sometimes we say inappropriate things at inappropriate times.  And it can cause a stir, an argument, a fight or even end relationships.

Mild Example: I was in class earlier this week.  Scientists need to stay up on new developments, so along with those classes I also study psychology, religion and particle physics.  Yes, I am an absolute gas at parties.  During this class, the professor asked us to brainstorm ways to relieve stress.  As he went around the room, he got the usual answers like exercise, meditation, read a book.  He got to me and I answered, “Masturbation.”  Valid, but it caused a minor ruckus because it is something that many of these older students were raised not to discuss.  They wondered aloud whether I was a sex addict or just a pervert.

You’d think I was the Devil himself when I explained that work in the sex industry and that sexual health and wellness was my particular field.  I do not argue or try to justify my job to people with closed minds any more.  And sadly, the woman with whom I had been doing quite well decided that we shouldn’t sit next to each other in class or hang out during break.

C’est la vie.

Sometimes you cannot separate your job life and your home life.  But you can try your best to keep it to yourself.  Yet a slip of the tongue is only a split second away.  (How many of you when I said “Slip of the tongue” started thinking about oral sex?  I thought so.  I’m a big fan myself.)  Life can be difficult when it revolves around sex during all of your waking hours.  Statements like “I’ve made a breakthrough in anal sex.” or “What do you think of this?  Would you use it on your pussy/cock/tits/ass?” or “How does this feel in your mouth?  Creamy?” taken out of context can be trouble.  And you just can’t use a slogan like, “Dr Tim, making butt-fucking easier for 30 years!”

I wouldn’t trade my life for anything. 

Check out this link: http://www.lamag.com/features/Story.aspx?ID=1715666  It is the story of Doc Johnson and how my boss and his family handle being in the industry.  It is a fascinating read.  I read it and I still like him!

Trade Show Fever (Part Two)

And if the ANME Show was not enough excitement, next came the XBiz Show and with it the XBiz Awards.  That was one amazing night!

Ron Braverman, my Boss, received the Industry Pioneer Award.

 

The Man, The Legend.

Many of you young folks do not remember back in the 70’s when what we were doing was not considered exactly legal.  Sure, today you can order any type of sex toy from the web (except in a few states) and wham, bam it is at your door.  No, these are the pioneers that stood up and declared that everyone has a right to an orgasm they way they want it!  Much secrecy and hard times a-plenty.  But these folks stood tall and pushed forward.

He was introduced by his son, Chad Bravermen in a truly moving speech.

Chad Bravermen, the next generation.

But Chad was not the only family that was there for Ron.

The Braverman Clan

When the award was announced, the Doc Johnson table went wild!

We are so d-mn proud!

And his smile lasted long after he left the stage.

All smiles!

Remember: He did this for you.  A good 36+ years defending your right to cum as you please.  Standing up to governments trying to make this world a better, more empowered nation of sexually fulfilled people.  Satisfied people are happy people and happy people, well they have no limits, do they?  Ron Braverman fought in the trenches so next time are about to rub one out, dedicate it to Doc Johnson.  Now get out there and win one for the Doc!

It's all for you, Baby. Enjoy.

 

Trade Show Fever (Part One)

Lordy, Lordy it has been a trade show whirlwind!

If I started talking about everything that happened, we would be here for hours!  So let’s just look at some pretty pictures instead.  (I reserve the right to comment as necessary.)

Beginning with ANME 2012.  The whole team got together for something special!

We May be up to something...

Yep, we have a little bit of something for everyone!  Please, no cat jokes.  Her claws are sharp!

Yes, we were.

Beautiful!

She will probably hurt me for this, but then I usually pay extra for that!

Sing along, "Swiss Miss, Dominatrix!"

And where would we be without…

Arrrgh! Avast me hearties!

But it was a wonderful show, we saw so many old friends, made new friends and I did not hear of a single drop of blood being shed.  What we do is exciting because we get to help you get it on!

Ready to help. Because we are just like that.