Happy Veterans’ Day!

12 Nov 2010 Leave a comment

by Mystertim in Couples Sexuality, Dildos, Female, Female Sexuality, Personal Lubricants, Physiology, Safe Sex, sex toys, sexuality, Strap-ons, Uncategorized Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Happy Veterans’ Day!  Yes, I know I am a day late.  But I have a really good excuse.

Since all of these fine folks have done their bit, I thought that I should do their bit too.  I mean, after all they have been or are still in service to this great country of ours the US of A!

So I dedicated all of yesterday to servicing our service people.  That’s right, Good Old Dr Tim was tending to the “special” needs of any and all females that served in our armed forces.  And boy, is my tongue tired!

But they helped keep us the Land of the Free, so they are especially deserving of  a special thank you.

How about you?  Did you Service the Service yesterday?  You should!

I’m just saying…

Wrap That Wrascal!

05 Aug 2010 1 Comment

by Mystertim in Anatomy, Couples Sexuality, Female, Female Sexuality, Male Sexuality, Physiology, Psychology, Regulatory, Safe Sex, Safety, Science, sexuality, STD Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

How’s your summer going?  Haul any boxes of books lately?  Make the evening news?

Mine has been pretty interesting.  Bar-Be-Que, Barq’s and Babes!  True summer living.

But even though these are those crazy, hazy, lazy days of summer, you had better watch out.

There was a report released by Harvard University claiming that men over 40 who use erectile dysfunction medications have triple the rate of sexually transmitted diseases as compared to men who did not use the drugs.

May I see a show of hands for those that are surprized by this result?  Not too many of you, huh?

In fact, according to the CDC, the 40-49 year age range accounted for the largest proportion of newly diagnosed HIV/AIDS cases in 2007.  Don’t believe me, go check it out.  I’ll wait.

Welcome back.  Sobering, isn’t it?  Let’s pull up our psychiatric armchairs and see if we can’t figure out why this is so.

Older folks are from a different time, a different age, a different mindset.  Last century, back when I was in college, the worst thing we could catch could be cured with a shot of penicillin.  There were fewer taboos.  And a LOT more risky sex than happens today.  After all, tis better to fail a Wasserman test than never to have loved at all!  The younger set may have more recent partners, but they actually tend to be safer than us old fogeys.

Even old Dr Tim isn’t sure if he has any condoms at home.  I’ll admit it, I hate condoms.  I hate wearing them, I hate the feel or lack thereof of them, I hate the taste they leave behind.  There isn’t much I like about them at all!  Except maybe the saving my life part.  I grew up with skin on skin and that my friend is a hard habit to break.  Even though I get a full STD workup every other month, I should still wear them.  And I do, if she insists.  But it shouldn’t have to be that way.  Even though women do ask to  see my test results before we proceed to Happy Land, using condoms should be an SOP.  (Standard Operating Procedure)

What about choice?  You may ask.  What about condoms in adult entertainment films?

So choose, Death or Cake. (Pie really.)  And as for adult entertainers, they are making a risky choice, but I defend their right to make it.  I consider adult film performers as stunt people.  They make risky decisions on how to use their bodies for the gratification of others.  I respect that.  Quite a few of those performers are my close personal friends and I would hate to see them be debilitated by some gruesome disease.  But I am not about to tell them how to do their job.  And I don’t think anyone else should either.  Those that try should probably try to get their own houses in order first.  However that is just my opinion.

And now that men suffering from ED can get help, they are picking up where they left off thirty years ago.  The game has changed since then and they havn’t read the new playbook.  Everyone needs to be reminded about the joys of safe sex.  No matter how old they are.  Anyone watch Penn & Teller’s show Bullsh*t about old people?  They still have sex.  The back alley slut is now the nursing home slut who thanks to modern medicine can get her favorite treat! 

Teach your parents well.  And your grandparents.  Anyone can die from HIV/AIDS and I’d rather it wasn’t you.

Lubricant Study

27 May 2010 Leave a comment

by Mystertim in Anatomy, chemicals, Couples Sexuality, Female Sexuality, Male Sexuality, Personal Lubricants, Regulatory, Safety, Science, sexuality, Uncategorized Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Anyone else read this today?

http://www.biologynews.net/archives/2010/05/25/use_of_lubricants_with_anal_sex_could_increase_risk_of_hiv.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+biologynews%2Fheadlines+(Biology+News+Net)

http://www.xbiz.com/news/121017

As you might have guessed, I have a few comments.

1) Lubricants cannot prevent the transmission of HIV or STDs. Not yet. And when they do, they will be presciption-available only. I know that there are a few existing studies that show that carrageenan MAY inhibit the HIV virus, but anybody marketing on that claim faces substantial wrath from the FDA when caught.

2) Yes, if people are going to engage in unprotected anal sex, it would be nice if lubricants do not facilitate the virus. This is another reason the FDA wants all personal lubricants to become registered medical devices. So that they can have more control. Should they have it?

3) Medical device registration and testing is very thorough. It is safety based and until now, no one had considered whether lubes could be preventative.* The FDA requires so much testing of toxicity that this study surprises me. I mean the FDA even requires that lubricants are injected into the bloodstream of mice as a safety test related to rectal claims.

4) Lubes don’t cause infection. Unprotected sex with unsafe partners causes infection.

* Actually, I have been reading about companies working on lubricants that would actually prevent the transmission of HIV for years. How I wish I had that R&D budget!

So how much protection do we as a society owe people who are hard of thinking? Do we pass more and more laws until every chemical, food or activity is illegal?

Where does personal responsibility come in to the picture? If someone engages in unprotected anal sex with multiple partners, do they deserve to die? I don’t think so.

Should you have to get a prescription from your doctor for personal lubricants and tell that person it is for anal sex? Doctors can tell if you have even been anally receptive, so would that be a big deal for you?

Should all products of every kind be pulled off the market until such a time that they are deemed safe by scientific study? And will people believe it? The fact that every scientific organization around the world has cleared phthalates for use in toys has not stopped the emotional banning of the substances. People want science to help them, but then refuse to believe its findings because some reporter or blogger thinks they know more than hundreds of scientists.

Personal lubricants are a necessity of life. We need them. But trusting your lubricant to protect you from your poor choice is like trusting your car to protect you while driving drunk.

Please think and act responsibly. I do not want to lose any more of you.

Interesting Question! (Caution, naughtiness ahead!)

30 Apr 2010 1 Comment

by Mystertim in Anatomy, chemicals, Couples Sexuality, Dildos, Female Sexuality, Male Sexuality, Personal Lubricants, Physiology, Psychology, Science, sex toys, sexuality, Strap-ons, Uncategorized Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“So Tim, is this too big for someone to get up their butt?”  

What an interesting question to start my day.  So let’s get ahead by getting a little behind…  

Anal sex.  Now that is one hotly contested topic.  You may remember that I briefly mentioned backdoor activities last month.  (https://quantumcogitation.com/2010/03/12/doors-what-is-behind-door-number-three/)  

Or you may remember my brief discourse about men on the receiving end of a strap-on.  (https://quantumcogitation.com/2008/08/29/strap-it-on/)  

Good memories, good times.  So let’s roll up our sleeves and really get into it now.  If this topic bothers you, here is something to keep you occupied.  

Look deeply into my eyes.

  For the rest of us, let’s take a close look at the anus, rectum and points north.  Here is a brief, unromantic diagram of said region.  

  To accomplish anal intercourse, we have to get past the exterior sphincter, through the anus, past the interior sphincter, through the anal canal, getting past the Dentate line and into the rectum!  Whew!  Anyone have a GPS ready?  OK, I know that everyone knows, or thinks they know what they are doing.  But honestly, a lot of you don’t.  (If I had a nickel for every woman nodding her head right now…)  

 The anus has quite a concentration of nerve endings and that can bring either great pain or great joy depending on your approach.  The anterior wall of the rectum leads to prostate massage in men and tickles the vaginal canal in women.  While the external sphincter is a voluntary muscle which we can contract or relax, the interior sphincter muscle is involuntary.  That means you really cannot control it.  So we need to spend some time on figuring out how to make it relax.  And as always, we have options:  

 1) Brute force, just ram it home.  DO NOT DO THIS!!!!  Who are you kidding?  That only plays in story books.  To force the anal sphincter complex open can cause a lot of damage.  It can cause tearing, bleeding, damage to the sphincters leaving you incontinent, if misguided potentially perforate the intestinal walls.  Which could lead a nasty little thing called death.  Let’s not go there, let’s keep this safe, sane and consensual (SSC).  

 2) Get them drunk!  Oh come on people!  DON”T DO THIS!!!  If one or the other partner is impaired by one substance or another, you can have the same injuries listed in item number one.  Either they won’t feel if something has gone wrong or you may not be attentive to their situation.  Either way, bad.  

 While there is nothing wrong with a glass of wine or a drink or two, stay alert if you are going to participate in risky types of sexual behaviour.  It needs to be fun, not traumatic.  No need to call those men in white jackets even if ambulance sirens turn you on.  They really aren’t interested in what you were doing anyway.  

3) Anal desensitizers.   Yep, they exist.  Heck we even sell them!  Usually they are a gel, cream or spray that contains lidocaine or benzocaine.  These are often used in anorectal drugs to ease the pain of hemorrhoids.  Now, these work very well, but they are not my first choice.  If over-used, you may not feel any “bad” pain if it occurs.  And I have always wondered, why engage in anal sex if you don’t want to feel it? So…  

 4) Warming lubes.  Yes, we sell those too!  Remember what it feels like when you get a hot oil massage?  You melt under that person’s hands.  Well, this is very similar.  Gentle caressing with the product warming your anus and your partner’s attention warming your heart.  You will probably open up like a blooming rose.  Hard, nasty anal sex is great if you are experienced and in the mood, but if you are just beginning your anal explorations, you need a lot of prep time, care and gentleness.  

 OK, lubricants.  Yes the anal tract is a mucosal membrane so there is a certain degree of lubrication available naturally.  But you should add some more.  Lots more!  So much so that you need a new bottle every time!  (Did I mention that my company sells lubricants?  Thought so.  Daddy needs to get paid!)  

 Seriously, use lots.  I prefer silicone lubes, but whatever floats your boat.  Anyone remember how Crisco sales jumped when fisting became all the rage?  

 5)  Oh yeah, rimming helps.  We can talk about that in a later post.

  So we are in!  Now with the anal canal and rectum, you have a comfortable six inches for penetration.  Stroke away to your heart’s content.  And hopefully to your partner’s orgasm!   Here are a couple of diagrams to show you where to find the anus on a male or female.  

 Now that we have covered that, how large of an item can you stick your butt?  From some videos that I have seen, really, really big!  I have seen baseball bats, arms up to the shoulder (not recommended), champagne bottles, fruit/vegetables of all kinds and a football.  I guess the real question is not how large of an item can I stick up my butt, but do I want to spend my life wearing diapers?  Yes, extreme anal stretching can lead to having an orifice that can no longer close or even prolapse.  Prolapse is when the insides come outside. 

If you keep your anal insertions limited to finger/penis/hand size, you can keep your stuff tight with kegel exercises.  Yes they work for the ass as well as the vagina!  Squeeze those muscles tight, count to ten, release and repeat.  A few sets of ten daily and you will be able to peel a banana!  Even though if you have anal sex even once, your doctor will know the next time he takes a look down there.  So, really, there are no secrets from your doctor.   

I talk too much, but when it comes to anal sex, the two or more of you had better talk everything out so you know what is going to happen.  And please, wash thoroughly, douche your tush, wash whatever was inserted up the butt before inserting it somewhere else and please do not engage in ATM or ATV activities.    

Leave that to the pros.

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