Tricky, tricky, tricky (or The Economy and You)

17 Jul 2009 Leave a comment

by Mystertim in cosmetics, Couples Sexuality, Dildos, Female Sexuality, Male Sexuality, Personal Lubricants, Plastics, Psychology, Science, sex toys, sexuality Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

So, how’s it going these days?

A little rough?  Yeah, here too.  I mean the economy, the environment, politics, well everything is getting complicated.

For example: To save the Earth, stop using plastic bags!  Makes sense.  Plastic takes a long time to break-down and quite frankly the landfills are stuffed with plastic bags and bottles.  But guess what?  I put “Plastic bag manufacturer” + “plant closure” into a search engine and discovered that globally over 30,000 people have lost their jobs due to factories that make those plastic bags have had to close!  Decreased demand equals decreased supply equals decreased employment.

The economy is tanking, people are losing their jobs and you would rather save the planet?  Like I said, tricky.

And that brings me to sex toys.

How?  Easy.  When my mind gets frantic with political correctness, war, trauma, the economy, etc, nothing clears the mind better (in less time than time than meditation) than a good orgasm.  A good orgasm clears the mind, relieves the stress and generally brightens the day.  Now when it comes to orgasming, I’m a pretty handy guy. 😉

But sometimes you need more to really make it memorable.  Whether you are with your significant other, a friendly group or flying solo, toys and lubes can help.  And while there are many, many excellent products on the market, you should buy everything that my company makes.  (Remember the bit about decreased demand?  Daddy needs to get paid!)  There are all types of strokers, dildos, butt plugs, vibrators, cock rings, pumps, lubes, creams and stuff for every taste and every flavor.  If you aren’t sure what to buy, ask me!  I can help.

“But Dr Tim!” you say, “Everything seems so expensive!”  Well, yes.  Good sex toys can be pricey, but look at it this way: You could buy a sex swing, a good vibrator and some lube or go on vacation.  A vacation is over in a week, but those sex toys are something you will have for a long, long time.  (Apologies to Woody Allen.)

So leave your inhibitions at the door, grab your favorite partner or toy, put Skinimax on the flat screen and get it on!  Remember porn stars only have you in mind!  And do what they do just for you and at some level of personal risk as well.  God bless them one and all!

Slide it, slip it, clamp it or tie it.  Whatever gets you there.  I don’t judge, but studies have shown that folks with frequent sexual activity tend to be more even-tempered, calm, cool and collected.  You are cool aren’t you?  Some say that everyone should have at least three orgasms a week.

So I’m doing my bit.  How about you?

Secrets (Shhh!)

10 Jul 2009 Leave a comment

by Mystertim in cosmetics, Couples Sexuality, Dildos, Female, Female Sexuality, Male Sexuality, Personal Lubricants, sex toys, sexuality, Strap-ons, Uncategorized

Be vewy, vewy quiet.  I’m hunting celebrities!

And don’t tell anybody either!  It’s a secret!

What kind of secret?  Well, it is a shameless plug of a secret!  Our Director of PR/Marketing used her skill of persuasion most elegantly when she sweetly whispered to me, “Promote our summer secret promotion or I will have your goodies on the anvil.  And you know I can do it too!”

Here it is: http://topsecretroom.topcosales.us/

Check it out.  Have some fun.  Watch a video, look at pictures, see a photo of Lindsey Lohan.  Keep me out of the blacksmith’s shed!  (Although the leather is intriguing…)

FDA Approved????

22 May 2009 2 Comments

by Mystertim in chemicals, cosmetics, Personal Lubricants, Regulatory, Safety, Science, sex toys Tags: , , ,

I hear things.

And some of them can really be exasperating.  How many times has someone told you that they are an FDA approved lab or that all of their products are FDA approved?  Probably quite a few.  And probably a lie.  Maybe not intentional, sometimes non-technical people misinterpret the meaning of certain things.

Let’s set this issue to rest.  Brought to you directly from the FDA website (www.fda.gov) is the following list:

The FDA does NOT approve: Companies, compound drugs from pharmacies, cosmetics, medical foods, infant formula, dietary supplements, food labels including Nutrition Facts, structure-function claims on dietary supplements and other foods.

The FDA does approve: New drugs and biologics, medical devices (risk-based tier system we’ll discuss further down), additives in food for people, drugs and additives in food for animals, color additives used in FDA-regulated products.

That’s it!  There is no FDA-approved cosmetic.  We are not an FDA-approved laboratory or manufacturer.  We are an FDA registered facility.  That means that the FDA knows where we are, knows what we are manufacturing and can drop in to inspect us at any time.  (We are also registered with the State of California Department of Public Health, Food and Drug Branch.  They inspect us too!)

Time to take a look at a couple of the items mentioned above:

1) Medical devices – OK, you may wonder how this category affects you.  But it is very relevant.  Condoms, personal lubricants, cock rings, clitoral engorgement items are all medical devices!  Cock rings are in the lowest risk category and the FDA allows their sale without pre-market approval providing that they have the same use and are of the same technology of what is already on the market.  They also need the appropriate instructions and warnings in the language provided by the FDA.

Personal lubricants and condoms are Class II medical devices.  They can be cleared for marketing based on an FDA determination that they are substantially equivalent to an already marketed device of the same type.  This requires a lot of testing and expense by the manufacturing company.  And upon that determination, the product is granted a 510(k) number.   In case you were going to ask, if your new product does not strongly resemble one already on the market, you have to complete a NDA (New Drug Application.)

High risk medical devices like a mechanical heart valve require FDA approval after what can be years of testing and review.

2) Color additives for FDA regulated products.  Those would be all Foods, drugs and cosmetics.  The US works on a positive list.  If the colorant is listed for your particular application, you can use it.  If it is not on the list, no way.

3) Dietary supplements.  If someone offers you a vitamin pill, energy shot, “enhancement” pill and claims they are FDA approved, run away!  The FDA requires the following statement: “This product has not been reviewed by the FDA and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.”  And if it did, that dietary supplement would be a prescription drug.

So what have we learned today?  The FDA does not approve companies or bunches of products.  Since they don’t approve them, do we have to follow their rules?  You betcha!  Our products are regulated, but not necessarily approved.  There are many things that I haven’t touched on here.  Ask me!

Ask questions!  Question authority!

Good Taste! (Really, lose the bleach!)

24 Apr 2009 2 Comments

by Mystertim in Anatomy, chemicals, Couples Sexuality, Male Sexuality, Physiology, Psychology, Science, sexuality Tags: , , , , ,

To paraphrase a famous commercial: She wants a man that tastes good!

Down to business.  If you were to ask a variety of women why they spit or dodge, they will reply, “His stuff tastes nasty!”  So how do we avoid this problem?

Well, if she is regularly providing oral relief, quit complaining!  But the point is to make the experience pleasurable for her so that she will enjoy it.  Let’s find out what you have been up to lately.

Your diet:  If you are subsisting on Mega-burgers, onion rings and soft drinks, you have a problem.  Junk food equals bad tasting junk.  Have a salad once in a while!  Eat some fruit and vegetables.  Choose leaner cuts of meat, chicken or fish.  Drink some water.  You see all of the materials, chemicals, that you consume have an effect on how you look, how you taste and how you smell.  Sodas are very acidic.  They make you acidic.  Fried fatty meats give you a distinctive smell as opposed to vegetarians.

Your exercise routine:  Yes, no pain – no gain.  Working out regularly flushes the toxins out of your body via sweat and your excretory glands.  If you are a couch potato, all those wonderful bad things are pooling inside of you, turning to fat.  Yes, fat guys can get laid.  Fairly often too!  But they really have to work at it.  They need to be damn charming and eloquent.  Climb every mountain indeed.  However, obesity can lead to hypertension, diabetes, heart disease and stroke to name a few.  And those medications are not always erection-friendly.  Get off your ass and take a walk or something.

But if you eat right and exercise daily, you can make your life much easier.  Not only will you be healthier, more alert and ready for action, you will taste better too!  Have you ever heard the term “clean sweat?”  It exists.  That is the light sweat coming from a healthy man or woman who just participated in some light to medium impact exercise, like a sexual encounter.  Mmmmm, think of your favorite Lady with a light sheen of sweat covering Her body as you un-make the bed.  Nice?  You bet!  You don’t mind lying next to Her after that, do you?  She’s happy too.

Even then, genetics may have dealt you a bad hand and your semen still has that ammonia flavor to it.  You need to lose the bleach!  How can you do that?  Well, there is a lot of folklore on that question.  Most popular is to drink lots of pineapple juice for a couple days before sex.  That works for some.  Others say to eat spices like cinnamon to take the bitter edge off the taste.  But can you maintain that particular regime every day?  It is hard enough to eat right in this day and age, but to maintain yummy sperm too?  Brutal.

Too much to eat every day!

Too much to eat every day!

There are some supplements that claim to help make your semen sweeter and help make her taste sweeter as well.  (Yes, the same conditions apply to the ladies.)  We have all visited the Bakery from time to time…

The best supplement I have found is Semenex.  Yes my company manufactures and sells it, but I tested many of the commercially available products and after tweaking the patented formula a tiny bit found it to be very effective.  It is a combination of fruits and spices that goes down smooth when mixed in water or shakes.  And if your diet is at least quasi-healthy, one dose a day for a couple days really makes a difference.  While no true, scientific clinical studies have been done to verify the claim, there are many, many testimonials from happy couples to groups who did taste comparison testing.  (Now there is an interesting thought!)

Mmm... Tasty...

Mmm... Tasty...

In the end, you have to be a healthy individual.  Clean up your act and your Lady should be more than willing to provide some good loving.  Supplements do help, so don’t be afraid to try some and improve your game.

Oh yes, never forget to return the favor.  She deserves it!

Premature Ejaculation (What, too soon?)

22 Dec 2008 5 Comments

by Mystertim in Anatomy, chemicals, cosmetics, Couples Sexuality, Female Sexuality, Male Sexuality, Personal Lubricants, Physiology, Psychology, Science, sex toys, sexuality Tags: , , , , ,

I’ll try to keep this short.

Folks, have you ever been in a sexual situation where the game was over before the coin toss decided?  Then you may have had an experience with premature ejaculation.  What does that really mean?

Premature ejaculation is when a man has an orgasm sooner than he or his partner would like.  If it just happens once in a while, that is fairly normal and reciting baseball scores or thinking of Aunt Martha’s arm fat may slow you down just enough.  However, if it a regular occurance, you may want to look into the issue.

Folks used to think that premature ejaculation was purely a psychological problem, but modern medicine has determined that there are physical causes as well.  Let’s take a quick look at it.  First, there is no medical standard as to how long a man should last before orgasm.  The largest indicator is that orgasming too soon causes distress or concern between partners.  But remember, there doesn’t have to be a partner.  You can also experience premature ejaculation during masturbation.  The question is, “Does it bother you?”

There are many possible causes.  Psychologically, perhaps you have established a mental pattern which could include having to rush to orgasm to avoid being caught or feelings of guilt over sex.  Yes, you can train your body to respond through repeated actions or thoughts.  So please, be nice to yourselves.

Biologically, it could be caused by abnormal hormone levels, abnormal levels of neurotransmitters, abnormal reflex activity of the ejaculatory system, thyroid, inflammation or infection of the prostate or urethra or unspecified inherited traits.  So it could be a combination of problems, or a single source.  Current thought leans towards a single source if this has been a lifelong problem.  Of course this can all be complicated by impotence (we’ll talk about this later), stress, medication or health problems.

When should you seek help?  If you are unhappy, talk to your doctor!  I cannot stress enough that your doctor has heard it all before and can help.  Don’t fear the MD!  Are there some things you can try before going to the doctor?  Sure!

Try the Squeeze Technique.  Begin sexual contact as normal.  If it feels like you are going to ejaculate, have your partner squeeze your penis right where the head meets the shaft until the feeling goes away.  It should only be several seconds.  Then continue.  Don’t worry if you go a little soft.  Simba will be up for the challenge as soon as sexual activity resumes.  Repeat as necessary, soon you may be able to control the feelings without squeezing.

Squeeze 101

Squeeze 101

Or…

You could masturbate an hour or two before sex.  The second orgasm almost always take longer to reach.  (Which reminds me of a joke:  A man picks up a sex worker for a paid encounter.  After she disrobes she sees him in the corner masturbating furiously.  She asks him why and he replies, “For $100 you’re not getting the easy one!”)  Or as a couple, you can decide not to have intercourse every time and focus on other sexual activities which may relieve some of the performance anxiety.  It may also help you feel more comfortable in your sexuality as well.

My friend Karinna Kittles-Karsten (www.sacredlove.com) is a strong believer in Sexual Toning.  She is brilliant.  Check out her website, you’ll thank me for it someday.  But don’t forget to thank her too.  Here is how she describes Sexual Toning:  Note: if you have a urinary tract infection, consult a physician before attempting.  1. Come into a squat position with your heels turned in slightly.  Elbows between your knees, bring hands into a prayer position. 2. Inhale and contract the small muscular area between your anus and genitals. 3. Exhale and relax the muscles. Repeat nine times to start.  When you become comfortable, work up to 3-4 sets a day.

Work those PC Muscles!

Work those PC Muscles!

You can also work this area sitting at your desk.

Then we have topical medications.  There is a category of Over the Counter Drugs (OTC) called Male Genital Desensitizers.  These can be creams, gels or sprays usually containing benzocaine or lidocaine.  These are sprayed/massaged on the head of the penis, under the head in particular.  After a few moments, there will be a mild numbing effect.  This will theoretically delay the physical sensations that lead to premature ejaculation.  Be sure to use it five minutes or so before engaging in intercourse.  After all, we just want to slow ourselves down, not numb our partner, right?  These products can be found in drugstores, on-line and in high class adult emporiums.  Male Genital Desensitizers are recognised drugs that are regulated by the FDA.  Only FDA registered OTC manufacturers can produce them.  Your penis is serious business and believe it or not, the US Government wants to protect it!

This is a drug folks!

This is a drug folks!

(Say, Topco Sales and Basic Solutions are FDA registered OTC manufacturers!  What a lucky coincidence.)

So, if you suffer from premature ejaculation, you do not have to suffer alone.  Talk to your partner, talk to your doctor, get yourself in better physical shape, increase your sexual repertoire, use a topical product for those precious extra minutes.  You are a stallion.  Never forget that.

side-view-human-male-reproductive-system

Triclosan – Killing Germs or Killing Us?

16 Dec 2008 Leave a comment

by Mystertim in Anatomy, chemicals, cosmetics, Dildos Tags: , , ,

Quick!  In what types of products do you find triclosan?

Oh, hand sanitizers, toy cleaners, deodorant, just about anywhere you would find a good cosmetic biocide.  (also used as a preservative or deodorant agent.)

And what has the media taught us?  That triclosan can be toxic when used at extremely large doses!  Deary, deary me!  Not another chemical that can kill?  Why is being beautiful so deadly?  And who created the phrase “drop dead gorgeous” anyway?

Triclosan – and organic chlorinated aromatic compound whose functional groups are representative of ethers and phenols.  It has been shown to be effective in reducing and controlling bacterial contamination on the skin.  Usually used at 0.1% to 0.3% w/w it can be used by physicians at much higher concentrations for specific purposes.

Now the world gets concerned with the multiple products that can be used daily sparking fears of overdosing.  The team at Ciba (major manufacturer of triclosan) says that extensive testing on animals and human volunteers has shown that while triclosan does circulate in the blood during use, it is 200 to 300 times less than the amount that showed any effects on the animals.  Also, when the human discontinues use of triclosan products, triclosan is no longer detectable in the system.

So, how do we call this one?  My personal opinion is that there shouldn’t be any problems with occasional usage.  I wouldn’t use it everyday, but then I’m not a surgeon or doctor dealing or touching sick people all day.  Plus, they are great for cleaning post-use sex toys!

Want to learn more?  Try these two sites.  They are lots of fun!

http://www.ciba.com/ind-pc-triclosan.htm

http://www.beyondpesticides.org/pesticides/factsheets/Triclosan%20cited.pdf

WTBPA? (or Bisphenol A, What’s that about?)

31 Oct 2008 Leave a comment

by Mystertim in chemicals, Plastics, Safety, Science, sex toys Tags: , , , ,

Bisphenol A. 

What is it?  Where is it?  Is the a risk?  Won’t somebody please think about the children?

This is a toughie.  You may have contact with Bisphenol A (BPA) every day and just not know it.

What is it?  It is a monomer used in many plastic items like; polycarbonates, epoxy, phenolic, ethoxylene, ion-exchange resins, corrosion-resistant unsaturated polyester-styrene resins, reinforced pipes, food packaging materials and vulcanizates intended for use in contact with food and drink.  It is also one of many stabilizer for polyvinyl chloride (PVC.)

That’s a whole lot of BPA going around.  Canada just banned its use in baby bottles back on October 20, 2008.  Which is strange because the FDA, the ECB, the EFSA and the ACC all claim it is harmless as used in humans.  (FDA – US Food and Drug Administration, ECB – European Chemicals Bureau, EFSA – European Food Safety Authority, ACC – American Chemical Council)

However, the NTP (US National Toxicology Program) thinks that there could be a risk.  And they have announced that they will review its decision and re-evaluate the evidence.  And while telling us not to worry, the FDA has formed a BPA Task Force for the review of current research and new information.

That kind of leaves us all in the air, huh?  Canada says it is bad for babies and some groups want to ban it completely.  Not as easy as it sounds.

Have you used anything from the grocery store that is in a can?  Vegetables, aerosol whipped cream, tuna, soda, beer?  Most metal food cans are lined with and epoxy resin.  Remember that long paragraph earlier in this column?  Yep.  They all have BPA in them.  Now can manufacturers are looking into replacements.  They have to, it is a matter of economic survival.  Whether or not BPA is harmless, if the consumers want it gone, it had better go away.  You would pay a nickel more for safe packaging, right?  So even if it is harmless, industry will make more money off your fear.  The practice is very common.  Ever watch the “news?”

So what does BPA allegedly do?  The usual litany of diseases: cancer, diabetes, obesity, lower sperm count, Downs Syndrome, alters development of babies.  Not one good thing in the bunch.

How can we avoid it?  I’m glad you asked.  Stay away from polycarbonate bottles.  BPA can leach out of the plastic if heated, exposed to acids or even just with age.  (By the way, plastic water and soda bottles in the store don’t have BPA in them.)  Don’t cook in plastics.  I use glass on the rare occasion that I use a microwave.  Watch your recycle codes.  The safer choices for use with food are 1 (PETE), 2 (HDPE), 4 (LDPE) and 5 (PP).  Try to avoid preparing, storing or eating/drinking from 3 (V), 6 (PS) and 7 (other, except new bio-based plastics that are labelled as such.)

Avoid using plastic containers in the microwave.  Beware of cling wraps for microwave use.  Use alternatives to plastic packaging whenever possible.  And always recycle everything you can!  If you want to know more, drop me a line and I will help as much as I can.

And to think people used to laugh at me when I drank out of a beaker…

The Amazing Clitoris

15 Oct 2008 4 Comments

by Mystertim in Anatomy, Female, Physiology, Psychology, Science, sexuality Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Pop Quiz!

Is the clitoris more like an iceberg or a paper airplane?  Use both sides of your paper if necessary.

BOTH!!  But unless you have made a specific study of the body part in question, you may be amazed by that answer.  Let’s get scientific…

You may be familiar with the glans of the clitoris, or “the little man in the boat” as it was called back in my youth.  But the actual structure is much larger, with most of it hidden internally by bone and fat.  Just like an iceberg!  You see only the tip, but there is more, much more!  Now imagine a paper airplane.  Start at the point.  That is the glans.  Now follow the two wings outward at an angle.  These are the two arms of the clitoris.  They extend almost to where the muscles that run up the inner thigh end.  That makes the area where the inner leg meets the pelvis pretty sensitive.  No wonder she loves it when you nibble there!  Between the arms are two bulbs, one on each side of the vaginal opening.  Check out the illustration:

Anatomy

Anatomy

You may be wondering just what the heck all this does.  We have an idea, but believe it or not, the female sexual organs have never been studied as much as the men’s.  In fact much of what we now know about the clitoris has been recently re-discovered in the 1980’s.  No that isn’t a typo.  I really wrote since the 1980’s.  Kinda sad, huh?  For a long time, medical texts basically ignored the female sex stuff.  I read that the best information was from dissections done over a hundred years ago and that wasn’t quite accurate.

So, does the clitoris have a function?  Absolutely!  Lots of them!  Probably more than we have already figured out too.  For example, the clitoris surrounds the urethra on three sides while the fourth is embedded in the vaginal wall.  When stimulated, the erectile tissue swells and helps close the urethra possibly preventing bacteria from entering and causing bladder infections.  Yes, it can and does happen.  The bulbs swell keeping the vagina firm to aid penetration.  And you thought only men had erectile tissue.  Another favorite function is of course, aiding in orgasm.   We should talk about orgasms sometime.  Let’s plan it over coffee.

So from the look of things, it is possible that the G-Spot is really part of the clitoris.  Nibbling of the hip joints and pressure on the pubic bone all seem to make sense when you consider the total anatomy.  There may even be no difference among clitoral, vaginal and anal orgasms as everything seems to be tied together.  Fascinating!

So who finally did all this research?  Well one of the most important people you can thank Helen E. O’Connell (Department of Surgery, University of Melbourne, Parkville, Victoria, Australia and Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology, University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, Michigan) who has been spearheading the research into the anatomy and physiology of the clitoris and has been doing a lot of great work on health issues that effect women.  Hopefully with her work, urinary surgeries could be accomplished without compromising sexuality.  Just as prostate operations can leave some men partially impotent, many surgeries can damage the nerve pathways affecting the clitoris.  (The illustration is from her paper “Clitoral Anatomy in Nulliparous, Healthy, Premenopausal Volunteers Using Unenhanced Magnetic Resonance Imaging” written with John O. L. DeLancey.  J Urol. 2005 June; 173(6): 2060-2063)  It’s a good read if you into that knid of thing.  (And I am!)

It’s about time.

How ‘Bout Them Parabens?

08 Sep 2008 2 Comments

by Mystertim in Personal Lubricants, Preservatives, Science, sex toys Tags: , , , , ,

Time to talk about preservatives.  This is a pretty touchy subject with a lot of big guns on both sides of the debate.  Let’s see where we go…

The first thing to mention is that preservatives can be toxic.  Of course they can.  Their sole job is to kill things so that our products stay fresh and usable.  Preservatives kill off nasty microbiological organisms like viruses, bacteria, yeast and mold.  That’s a good thing right?  Otherwise we would only have local cosmetics that have to be kept in the refrigerator and replaced every few days.  No more national brands and a big upswing in the sale of portable coolers.

I mean, how clean are your hands?  Pretty darn clean you think.  You think incorrectly.  One of my favorite show and tell demos when training new chemists is to ask them just like I asked you how clean their hands are.  Then I have them put their thumb on the agar in a micro plate.  (Agar is what we use as food to test for microbial growth.  Give ’em food, a moist warm place to thrive and see if it can survive.)

Two days later, I show them the plates.  And the amount of growth is always amazing.  All kinds of bumps and fuzz of many different colors.  Now we know with great certainty who washes their hands after using the restroom and who doesn’t.  It is truly an eye-opener.

Wash your hands!

Wash your hands!

So if a scientist’s hands which are washed religiously and covered with gloves aren’t clean, how do you think the average person’s hands compare.  Chemistry 101: A real chemist washes their hands before they use the restroom as well as after.

And you think nothing about sticking your finger into your jar of cream after a long day?  Ugh!

OK, so now we know that things are dirty and that preservatives are used to combat all the nasties that can grow on our skin.  So let’s cut to the chase and get to parabens.

parabens

Parabens: A group of preservatives (esters of p-hydroxybenzoic acid) used very commonly in cosmetics, food, pharmaceutical and industrial products.  You can find them on labels listed as: methylparaben, propylparaben, ethylparaben, butylparaben, isopropylparaben or isobutylparaben.  They were first introduced in the 1920’s, hit commercial cosmetic use in the 1930’s, were first listed as GRAS (generally recognized as safe) in 1995 by the US EPA at a combined percentage of 0.8% in cosmetic products.  The average cosmetic concentration of parabens usually runs between 0.20-0.40%.  And as with any material, it is possible to be allergic to parabens.

But in 2004, there was a study by Dr Philippa Darbre at the University of Reading that showed out of twenty breast tumors studied, all of them had parabens in them.  Wow. That set the press in motion and before long many thought that parabens cause breast cancer.  Why would they think that?  Well, it seems that parabens (butylparaben is the most potent of the family) have some oestrogenic activity.  Estrogen is an endocrine distrupor.  Disrupt the endocrine system enough, cancer can grow.  The test was published in the Journal of Applied Toxicology.

So on the one hand, there are a few studies that show a causal link between parabens and breast cancer.  However, those studies bring more questions than answers.  On the other hand the US, EU, Japan, the National Cancer Institute and several respected naturalists do not see any cause for alarm.  The oestrogenic activity of parabens is approximately 100,000 times weaker than a woman’s natural estrogen.

Give the public what it wants.  Several groups have reopened studies on parabens and more work is being. done.  We should probably ban everything that causes cancer, huh?

Did you know that all plants naturally produce p-hydroxybenzoic acid?  They produce parabens to protect themselves against attack by micro-organisms.  Gee, just like we use them in cosmetics and personal lubricants!  And guess what?  Almonds, apples, broccoli, cherry, mango and many, many more have potent oestrogenic activity.  We consume more parabens through organic foods than we get from cosmetics.

Fruit Basket!

How does it end?  Parabens have been used safely for over 50 years.  They are stable, recommended for use with sensitive skin and no link has been conclusively shown between parabens and any cancer or illness.  If the thought of using them makes you uncomfortable, read the labels and buy products with alternative preservative systems.  It does however remind me of an old saying,

“A rumour can run around the world before the truth gets its shoes on.”

Strap It On!

29 Aug 2008 7 Comments

by Mystertim in Psychology, sex toys, Strap-ons, Uncategorized Tags: , , , ,

This topic was brought on by a comment I made in an earlier post called “Grilled Cheese Sandwich.”  But I needed the proper motivation to write this piece.  Well with the theme from “The Good, The Bad and The Ugly” playing in the background, I can man up and tackle the subject.

Men and Strap-ons

OK, what is a strap-on?  It is a device where a dildo or vibrator is held in a harness that is strapped onto another person.  The strap generally goes around the waist and between the legs with a holding device on the front to mount a sex toy.

Take it like a Man!

Take it like a Man!

You may be thinking, “Ain’t nobody going to stuff a banana up my tailpipe!”

Fair enough.

But let’s take a closer look at why we would think think that.  Lots of men would and do love engaging in anal sex with the ladies.  C’mon, how many of you guys have ever watched a woman walk away and thought, even for just a second, how warm and tight that would feel?  Oh yeah, pretty much all of us.

Some women have the attitude of, “If he wants me to take it back there, he can take it back there too so he knows how it feels.”

WHEW!  There’s a thought.  Reminds me of an old joke.  Remind me to tell it to you sometime.  Turns the whole world around when you think about bending over for her doesn’t it?  Yet you want her to do it without a second thought, don’t you?  Yeah you do.

But taking it up the ass doesn’t make her gay!  Women are supposed to be all access!  Since when?  I don’t remember getting that email or seeing that story in the New York Times.  Not even the Leisure section.

So it’s pretty much the gay thing isn’t it?  I thought so.  Well, like I mentioned before, don’t ever let yourself be talked into doing anything that you really, really don’t want to do.  Either of you.  So you may never get to enter through her backdoor.  Deal with it.  Nor do you have to give yours up either.  But I’m going to get medical on you here.

Prostate massage.  Learn it, live it, love it.  Yes I know that once a year you bend over and your doctor gives you the finger.  That’s different.  The doc is looking for any abnormal swelling.  And you know what happens when you get an enlarged prostate: constant urge to urinate, depressed libido and possibly an operation that takes away your ability for erection.  Damn.  Do you really want to risk that?  Sure, medicine has advanced, but you might still end up needing a balloon inserted in your penis and have to pump it up like a ball before the game.  Of course prostate massage is not guaranteed to eliminate risk of an enlarged prostate, but the massage is recommended by many physicians.

Learn it, love it!

Learn it, love it!

If you can loosen up a little, perhaps enjoy a little rimming (God bless her!) and a finger, you could learn all about prostate massage.  It can be a truly liberating experience.  Incredibly intimate experience with your Lady with one hand or mouth up front and a digit or two in the back will literally blow your mind! 

But your lover’s finger isn’t a rubber cock is it?  Back to gay paranoia.  Look, if your aren’t interested in having sex with men, a strap-on isn’t going to change your mind or character.  You can be the toughest linebacker in the league and still enjoy a good ramming from your Lady.  If the two of you are interested, start small.  Now you understand the look on her face when you brought home that enormous dildo from the bachelor party.  Consider the consequences of that sliding home inside you!

Another world turning moment, huh?

If your partner has any toys, look at them together.  What scares you the least?  Don’t worry.  She will be attentive and she will be very concerned about your well-being.  Especially if this is something she really, really wants to do.  So take a shower and be sure to wash well back there.

Get comfortable and pick a position.  Some men prefer doggy, so she can’t see the fear in your face the first time.  Some men prefer to be on their backs so that there is instant non-verbal feedback during the playtime.  Women are usually very good at picking expressions and clues that we never seem to see or even know that we are broadcasting.  Some men only let their partner play with their backdoor in a BDSM setting.  After all, if you are tied up you aren’t responsible for what happens to you, right?  (We will explore this thought process in a different post later, after more science stuff.)

Pick a toy.  Partake in some extended foreplay.  See?  It really is important.  Use lots of lube.  Let her try her finger and if that goes well, have her put in another, then a third.  It will feel strange.  Kind of like you want to have a bowel movement.  Don’t worry, if you went earlier and washed well, nothing embarrassing should happen.

Ready?  Here comes the toy.  She will go slowly and treat you the way she would like to be treated.  Please take note of this.  You may well get your turn later in the evening.  Don’t mess it up.  You will feel weird.  Your anus will feel stretched and will start to tingle.  Some men have an orgasm right there.  Some don’t.  Take it like a man.  You are planting the roses and doing it for her.  Many of you will actually learn to enjoy it.

She will go nuts for you.  You became vulnerable and opened up for her.  You trusted her.  You trusted her with your very manhood.  And you both probably got great orgasms out of it.  It could be a one time thing or could be added to your bedroom rotation.  At worst, it didn’t work out and one or either of you didn’t like it.  That is OK!  The point is you experimented together and could be drawn closer by the experience.  You understand her point of view by switching places.  It’s not for everybody.  If one of you likes it but the other doesn’t, well we know how to handle ourselves while staying true to a monogamous relationship don’t we?

At best, it is an incredible bonding experience.  One that is fulfilling, exciting and just plain hot.  There can be a lot of back and forth and marathon sex sessions are always welcome.  And they start happening more and more often too!

So does taking a finger, toy or strap-on make you gay.  Hell no!  But it will open doors to closer intimacy and who knows what experiment is next?  I wouldn’t miss it for the world.

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